Introducing your new American Gladiators, Jet and Phoenix

Back on February 23, I told you about how the female winner of American Gladiators was a former Portland Trailgangsta cheerleader, I mean dancer, named Monica Carlson. I also told you about how she was currently employed as a "sports model" whatever that is. I also mentioned that she is 5'7" with a 36 inch bust, a 28 inch waist with 38 inch hips, wears a size 6 dress and a size 8 shoe. Now I am going to mention that she looks absolutely smokin' as Jet in her new Gladiator gear.



They also have added some additional cheesecake to the mix with a broad named Phoenix. Nice pink hair. And wings.



Yeah, I'll be tuning in. And yeah, Crush is still the best.






NBC

Interlude: Lovely

NFL: T.O. will make sitcom debut alongside Flavor Flav
TRACK: Texas girl wins track team championship by herself
CBB: O.J. Mayo denies claims he took gifts at USC
CBB: Two Kentucky players decide to transfer
MLB: San Diego hurler Maddux notches 350th career win
INDYCAR: Dixon takes Indy 500 pole; Ganassi teammate Wheldon takes 2nd
NHL: Europeans in NHL on decline, survey says
TV: Hannah Storm to become new host for ESPN's morning SportsCenter

on 205th recommends: THE SPORTS HERNIA

As a singer Tony Romo makes a great quarterback

Tony Romo maybe should have taken some singing lessons from his GFF Jessica Simpson before embarking on singing Take Me Out to the Ballgame at Wrigley on Sunday.



Yeessh...

Don't mess with hot gymnasts

Alicia Sacramone is a hot gymnast. She also has a mean left hook as she shows a young man during her days at Brown University.







H/T: With Leather

O.J. admitted he killed Nicole

At least that's what author Mike Gilbert would like us to believe in his new book, How I Helped O.J. Get Away With Murder: The Shocking Inside Story of Violence, Loyalty, Regret and Remorse. I don't think the title of the book is long enough, but oh well.

Supposedly... a groggy Simpson, high on marijuana, confessed to killing his ex-wife after he was acquitted.

Gilbert also claims he helped his former friend wiggle out of the murder charges by suggesting how to bloat his hands so they wouldn't fit the notorious bloody gloves.

You mean, it's possible that O.J. lied? No way!

Simpson said he went to his ex-wife's condominium, but did not bring a knife with him. Simpson told him Nicole Brown Simpson had one in her hand when she opened the door.

In a soft mumble, Simpson told him: "If she hadn't opened that door with a knife in her hand ... she'd still be alive."

"Nothing more needed to be said," Gilbert writes. "O.J. had confessed to me. There's no doubt in my mind."

And here's the biggest shocker... O.J.'s lawyer says that what Gilbert claims is untrue. I didn't see that coming at all.

SI/AP

Interlude: Bammer

CFB: Saban among coaches bypassing rule via Webcam
CFB: 'Bama LB avoids serious injury in motorcycle accident
CFB: Central Florida cornerback injured in La. shooting
NFL: New witness account backs Benson's claim
NFL: Belicheat to walk away free from Diegate
MLB: Baseball suspends Mariners slugger Sexson for six games
OLYMPICS: Queen's granddaughter makes Olympic team
WWE: Nick Hogan gets eight months in the slammer

on 205th recommends: CAMELTAP

Meet the newest WAG, Chanelle Hayes

Man I love soccer in the U.K. No, no, not the game. The sport sucks, I mean the fact that there are almost as many hot girlfriends and wives as there are players. The mere fact that the Web site The Spoiler is up to #89 in their list of WAG's is proof of that. Now, according to The Sun, we can add one more to the list: Chanelle Hayes.



Apparently becoming a WAG in the U.K. is as much a sport as soccer...

She's got the pout and the clothes and now Posh Spice wannabe Chanelle has bagged herself a footballer boyfriend just like her idol.

Sadly for her, Tottenham Hotspur's Tom Huddlestone isn't exactly David Beckham.

The midfielder has invited the BB muppet to watch him on the subs bench against Liverpool on Sunday.

Earlier this week Chanelle was harping on about how she would never be a WAG.

Damn, even benchwarmers get hot chicks over there. Welcome to the club, Chanelle.

Here's a video of her new single... apparently all you have to do is be kinda hot to become a pop singer across the pond.

Danica Patrick sets women drivers back 20 years

After moving the women in racing situation forward by winning her first IndyCar race, Danica Patrick yesterday took away all that momentum by opening the door to hundreds upon hundreds of jokes about women drivers and their inability to park a car as she ran over a crew member yesterday.



Begin jokes in 3... 2... 1...

The top 10 pound-for-pound fighters in MMA

According to Sherdog/ESPN, that is...

Before you watch, take a wild guess at who's #1.

Uh, where's my future wife? Other than the obvious sexism they showed, do you have any arguments with their rankings?

H/T: AOL FanHouse

Interlude: Love, Joe

NFL: Joe Montana in love letter lawsuit
NFL: Federal judge orders Vick to pay Canadian bank $2.4M
NFL: Tapes reveal Patriots also stole offensive signals
CFB: Florida player charged for using dead girl's credit card
BOWLING: Blind bowler rolls 300 game
CYCLING: Furious driver takes out 50-strong cycle pack
NBA: Papa John's swamped thanks to 23-cent LeBron special
CBB: West Virginia coach Huggins hurt in airport fall
CBB: Two dismissed from George Washington basketball team
NHL: Retired Sabres enforcer Ray sues NHLPA again
BOXING: Judah injures arm; fight vs. Mosley postponed
CELEB: Hef makes offer to Miley Cyrus, when she's legal

on 205th recommends: TSD Magazine

Elisha Cuthbert owns a lot of bikinis

Good thing that Dion Phaneuf's Calgary Flames lost in the playoffs or we wouldn't have all these friggin' Elisha Cuthbert bikini photos.



Are you getting tired of me posting photos of Elisha on the beach? BAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Sorry... bad joke.

Cheryl Tweedy time!

My favorite WAG Cheryl Tweedy was out again and lucky for us someone snapped some photos. This go-round sees her out for some lunch with her footballer husband and all-around idiot Ashley Cole (not pictured, deliberately).



Yes, I am now covering Cheryl Tweedy when she eats. If she stops to take a shit and there are photos, I shall cover that too.

The Eagles cheerleaders are shooting their swimsuit calendar

The hottest cheerleaders in sports, the Philadelphia Eagles cheerleaders, are in the process of making their yearly book of hotness (aka their swimsuit calendar). This year they are also going green in ways other than the color of the teams unis.

The 38 bio-licious women on the squad will be wearing bikinis made of 95% organic cotton and recycled plastic soda bottles as well as jewelry and accessories made from bamboo and other recycled, upcycled and repurposed products such as CDs, computer chips, glass, cable wire, candy wrappers and watch parts. Additionally, the cheerleaders will be using cosmetics and hair supplies that are earth friendly and locations for the calendar shoot will include an ecological park and alternative energy elements.



Personally I think they could also do great things for the environment by not wearing any clothes at all. Just thing of the kids in China that wouldn't have to make those clothes, or the savings in materials used to make clothes for the girls. Yeah, naked is the ultimate way to go green.




PhiladelphiaEagles.com

Interlude: Not welcome

MLB: Clemens not welcome on U.S. team
NBA: Nets' Jefferson charged with assault
NBA: Owners' motion denied; Sonics trial to start in June
NBA: Nuggets' Anthony ticketed for speeding
NBA: Hawks' Williams suspended one game into next season
NFL: Tony Romo misses cut for the U.S. Open
NFL: Son of Eagles' Reid smuggles drugs into jail
NFL: HBO selects Cowboys for next Hard Knocks show

on 205th recommends: GORILLA MASK

The cheerleader mecca will be in Atlanta on June 7-8

Book your plane tickets and hotel rooms now, boys. The P-R-O Convention is taking place in Atlanta on June 7th and 8th. What's the P-R-O Convention, you ask? Well... it's where any stripper cheerleader that wants to learn how to be a better leader of cheers will be. Check out the sales pitch... Need a time-out dance? We have got you covered. A sideline routine? Done. Pom, funk, jazz... you will get it all. Yeah...



Among the top 10 reasons they give for girls to attend on MySpace are...

10. Dancing next to hundreds of beautiful girls as pretty as you isn’t as hard as it seems...really.

7. All the other Hot girls are doing it…c’mon you know you want to...

6. Because your Myspace and Facebook pages deserve pictures of other dancing divas besides the one’s you rehearse with each week...

Should I go on?

4. Three words...Pro Cheerleader Boots!

2. Share secrets with other Pro Cheerleaders that will save the world…like a) what push-up bra works best b) what pantyhose hold everything in the best and c) what lip-gloss won’t stick to your hair during a game.

Seriously, guys. We need to road trip this thing.

Still not sure if it's worth taking time off and spending a little coin? Here's a little more of what goes on there...

It will be held at the Sheraton Gateway Hotel Atlanta Airport, 1900 Sullivan Road, June 7th and 8th.

Still more reasons to go...

I urge you to visit there that weekend, take pictures, and send them to me. Word.

P-R-O Convention

Elisha Cuthbert and hockey boy are still playing at the beach

The comeback campaign being put on by Elisha Cuthbert is nothing short of spectacular these days. Who knew that all she needed was some hockey dick to get her back on the track to hotness?



However, some Canadian hockey fans aren't quite as thrilled about Dion Phaneuf's beach vacation with Elisha as we are.

BONUS: If you look REALLY, REALLY hard at the last picture below, you can see nip.

Interlude: Oops

NBA: Billups' 3-pointer in Game 2 should not have counted
HORSE RACING: Eight Belles' trainer: Drug tests will dispel rumors
TRACK: Montgomery denied bond in federal heroin case
MLB: Feds ask Canseco about seeking investors
MLB: MLB will hold ceremonial Negro Leagues draft
MLB: Union asks Selig about collusion against Bonds
BOXING: Chagaev-Valuev title bout postponed
PGA: Daly in the news, and Finchem takes notice
CFB: Drug, alcohol, driving charges for ex-Ga. Tech QB

on 205th recommends: THE SAVAGE SCIENCE

How the Roger Clemens AT&T commercial would go today

With all the recent developments surrounding Roger Clemens his old AT&T commercial with his wife Debbie really needed some updating. Thank goodness for the folks at Tirico Suave.



Here's the original if you need a point of reference.

This baby already has more game than I do

And can probably drink me under the table too. Check out this baby slamming beers and hitting on the lay-hay-hay-dies at a minor league baseball game. He has future White Sox fan written all over him.



H/T: Busted Coverage

Elisha Cuthbert in a bikini? Sure, why not?

Since y'all like Elisha Cuthbert so much, especially since she is in the midst of such a tremendous comeback from averageness, I thought I'd toss you a bone with some bikini pics. It's just the kind of guy I am. And yes that is her new beau hockey guy, Dion Phaneuf, in one of the pics below. I think I hate him.



Looking at that almost makes me wish I knew how to play hockey. You know, so she'd like me, and want to have sex with me and all that.