Greatest coffin evar

Bill Bramanti of Glenwood, Illinois plans to go out in style.



Hell, he's not even waiting. He's living in style as well!

[Bramanti] threw a party Saturday for friends and filled his silver coffin — designed in Pabst's colors of red, white and blue — with ice and his favorite brew.

Pabst needs to get this guy a free lifetime supply of their lager, pronto.

FOX/AP

Coolest Nerf gun evar

This specially made Steampunk Nerf rifle was all yours for the taking on eBay, but you didn't bid on it. What a loser you are. Jeez.



Yeah, that's what I'm talkin' about there, baby! I would totally rule the backyard Nerf Wards if I had this bad boy!

For the winning bid of $455 + $35 shipping, the proud new owner of this gun gets, as the auction description says...

Allow me to present to you the latest in steam powered weaponry, straight from the laboratory of Professor Oliver Shagnasty, Esquire.

Up for auction is a ONE OF A KIND, TOTALLY CUSTOM, NEVER DUPLICATED, ORIGINAL STEAM POWERED NERF.

Yeah, he called himself Professor Shagnasty.

The model 101 is a dual purpose hybrid with phase warp modulators and plasma splitting over-drivers that are attenuated by the operator to the required resonating frequency and of course boosted by steam power techno-wizardry.

Okay, Professor Shagnasty, the coolness of this gun is being drowned out by your doucheness. Never mind that we even mentioned it.



H/T: Geekologie

Coolest motorcycle evar

This bike is owned by one Mad Ron Laycock. No way that's his real name. But when you own a 3,800 HP jet cycle, I guess no one's going to say anything, huh? I totally want to pull into the parking lot at work with this thing.



Although if I did ride this monstrosity to work, you might not want to tailgate too close. Or walk behind it. Or ride your bicycle near it...





H/T: Jalopnik

Coolest watch evar

Introducing the Van Der Led WM2 Cellphone Watch. Pretty cool looking, huh?



The watch, which costs $471, has a 1.3-inch, 260k color touchscreen display, stereo Bluetooth, up to 240-hours of standby or 300-minutes of talk, plus 1GB of storage for MP3 or MP4 files, and it isn't 1/10th as ugly as every other version of cellphone watches that have ever been created.

Now if I could get some advertisers for this site (which had almost 600,000 page views last week ... you hear me advertisers?!) I might be able to afford one.

H/T: Slippery Brick

Professional Beer Pourer is a job?

According to the YouTube description of this video that is this guy's occupation. Bets job evar? Even if it isn't, these might be the greatest beer pours evar. He even has names for them like the Hook Shot, Flamingo Style, and the Double Inverted. I think I saw Mary Carey do some of those moves, but they looked nothing like this.



HT: SI: Extra Mustard

Awesomest BB gun evar

This is just pure insanity, which makes it totally awesome! Check out the Walther NightHawk BB Gun. I had to use bold print there, this gun requires it. This is the BB gun that Chuck Norris would use if he needed a gun that shot BB's, which of course he doesn't, because he's Chuck Norris.

GadgetKing has a shitload of specs on it (like a red dot sight and a pressure sensor switch for the attached light) which may interest some of you, but not me. I don't even want to shoot the thing, I just want to walk around with it scaring the shit out of everyone.


Only $159.99 at Amazon! If you buy one, let me know. I want to be your new best friend.

Product demo video!


H/T: Geekologie

Flying Lawnmower... I want it

So this video has been floating around in the tubes since 2006, but I just saw it so you're going to see too, because anytime I can call something "The coolest _______ I have ever seen" I'm posting it. And this is the coolest lawnmower I have ever seen. So there.



H/T: Geekologie

Interlude: Tanked

As a part of our effort to keep you in the know, every so often throughout the day, we'll drop some knowledge on you about the world, mostly sports, but we'll mix in some other stuff when appropriate.

NBA: Wolves owner says KG 'tanked it'
MLB: Red Sox threaten to boycott Japan trip
MLB: MLB cracks down on Obama team T-shirts
MLB: Bonds' status draws MLBPA's interest
CFB: Central Florida player dies after drills
CFB: Cal's No. 1 running back leaves program
TENNIS: World TeamTennis' Boston Lobsters moving to suburbs
CELEB: Ashley Dupré found in Girls Gone Wild video vault
COOL SHIT: How the Internet connects via undersea cables

UPDATE: CFB: Top QB recruit Pryor picks Ohio State over Michigan

The future of print advertising

Now I have absolutely no use for a Fridge Backpack, but I may just have to buy one to support this company's idea of how to do marketing. Check out the diagram below and see if you notice anything odd, and by odd I mean totally awesome!



Do ya see it?

H/T: Geekologie

The 20 greatest TV show intros of all-time

You know how some TV shows have opening credits that are so cool they might actually be better than the show itself? Or how some shows have songs that really set the show up and get you fired up to watch it? There have been many classic TV show openings and lots of memorable theme songs, but I got to wondering, what was/is the coolest opening montage/intro theme ever done for a TV show? I searched around the Net and did some jogging of my memory and came up with 20 I think you'll like (10 are under honorable mention).

Feel free to argue with my choices or the order in which they appear, but one thing you can't argue is just how awesome these openings were. Discuss which one was your favorite and please don't hesitate to mention any show opening you think I omitted in the comments section below.

10. Get Smart: For sheer the coolness of it, this opening was hard to beat.


9. The Incredible Hulk: One of the best opening lines ever.


8. Hawaii Five-O: The music, the waves, the scenes, awesome.


7. Miami Vice: Jan Hammer was the master of the theme song.


6. Batman: Man, I used to sit each day and pray that the Batgirl character would show up in the opening credits.


5. Cheers: Yes, I want to be where everybody knows my name.


4. The Sopranos: Possibly the best opening song for a TV show ever.


3. Spider-man: This made me wish I had Spidey senses.


2. The NBA on NBC: I had a hard time making this #2. A real hard time.


1. The Six Million Dollar Man: Was there ever a cooler opening montage? The crashing spaceship, the classic quotes. This was truly a masterpiece. Steve Austin (the Bionic Man, not the wrestler) was the man.


Honorable mention: Sanford & Son, The Addams Family, Speed Racer, COPS, The Jeffersons, Baywatch, G.I. Joe, Welcome Back Kotter, Knight Rider, and Underdog.

The largest hamburger evar

A Detroit-area restaurant believes it has broken the world record for "largest hamburger commercially available," topping the previous record of 123 pounds.

This sucker weighs in at a svelte 134 pounds. It sells for $350, requires 24 hours notice to order, takes three men using two steel sheets to flip it, has a 50 pound bun, and was eaten in 8-1/2 minutes by Rosie O'Donnell as a midnight snack.*

*Last fact made completely up, but still entirely plausible.

USA Today/AP

Someone has been reading my Blogger profile

Finally! My wish has come true. And it's in titanium!



Be sure to check out the "action shots" on the spork's site.

H/T: Holy Taco

The coolest toaster evar

Bet you didn't know that toasters could be cool. Well they can, and this one is.



Yeah, it's a slow news day.

H/T: Gibbs12

Shotguns are cool; taser shotguns are better

Why just blow someone away with an old-fashioned shotgun when you can drop them with a taser version? Enjoy the Taser x12 promotional video.

For some reason the Google ad immediately underneath this video when I went to get the code read like this: Free Fart Videos. 10 Farts That Shook The World Captured On Video! I wonder why that is. Maybe when you get tased with this motherfucker it makes you rip one of which legends are made.

Amazing mountain bike tricks

Once you get past the first minute of intro, this video is pretty amazing. The balance and skill shown is mind-boggling.

Our Navy makes us proud

Looks like the U.S. Navy has been doing some homework. Check out their newest creation, a 10 megajoule electromagnetic railgun!



Fuck Terminator...

A little over 10 megajoules means you’re looking at 5,600 fuckin' mph, baby!

When the system is completed, it’ll be firing shells with over six times that energy (well over 13,000 mph) using 64 megajoules of energy.

Here it is in action...

OhGizmo!